Heroic Paperwork Crusader: Civil Air Patrol’s Newest ‘Emergency’ Spectacle

In a groundbreaking shuffle that nobody saw coming except everyone, Civil Air Patrol’s National Headquarters Ops team decided it was finally time for a rollicking game of musical chairs. Chief Master Sgt. Mark Lahan has delightfully landed in the coveted position of the organization’s very first national emergency services officer. This prestigious yet mysteriously invented title might suggest a flurry of emergencies brewing on the horizon or simply a shortage of better acronyms. Either way, Sgt. Lahan will presumably spend his days with a superhero cape tucked under his uniform while valiantly battling the torrents of… paperwork.